Why do I do stupid things? (Part 3)
In my first post in this series, I discussed my weight and my desire to become less of a man than I currently am. Less of a man in pounds, that is. But I was stupidly continuing to eat more than I should, and to snack after dinner when I shouldn’t do that at all. I even came up with a pros and cons list.
In my second post in this series, I discussed my exercise habits and specifically bicycling. I really enjoy bicycling yet I don’t get myself up in the mornings to do it as often as I should. I reviewed the journey that got me back into bicycling as an adult.
Progress report: I’ve done better with eating since the second installment in this series. I’m usually stopping after my first serving of a meal, and I’m not eating after dinner like I used to. Especially junk. And I’m not bicycling as regularly as I’d like to, but I am getting out at least once or twice a week.
Visualizing Failure
What a stupid thing to do, huh? Instead of visualizing myself succeeding at things, I visualize myself failing at things. To the point that I usually end up in a panic about whatever it is that I’m fearing. Thankfully it almost never turns into a self-fulfilling prophecy. God has been very good to me though and either gotten me through or gotten me out of everything I’ve feared having to do for many years.
This can’t go on forever though. It’s not that I think God will one day just stop helping me or that there is a limit to his mercy — far from it. I am just saying that this is holding me back. If I want to reach my stated goal of being a better father, husband, employee, and more then I have to stop doing this stupid thing.
Visualize Success!
The solution to this one is simple. Visualize success! Well, technically it’s simple. Actually, there’s a strange “feedback loop”. Oh, and it’s stupid, too.
I fear success because then I’ll be asked to do more of whatever I succeeded at. Or my success will be recognized in some way and it might be in a public way. Good grief some psych doc could make a career out of me.
The obvious response to the feedback loop fear is that if I’m successful at whatever I was afraid of then I need to continue my success and do the next thing that pops into my fear circle.
Doing this over and over should logically get me past my fears and eventually fear would be a thing of the past! Wouldn’t that be wonderful.
So, I’ve got something on Thursday that’s giving me some fear issues. Visualize success. I can do this.
